Malaysia Veterinary Forum (Archive)

kenny8282 · Joined: 08 Jul 2006 Posts: 70

this is something i would like to share.....

This is the words of Dr. henryt which is someone i don't have a opportunity to meet but the words; which i think are nice and i would to share with. why i do this?? this is because i think there are lesser viewer there.therefore i've taken a step to put it here. i hope Dr. henryt don't mind about this??

Dr henryt wrote: Dear XXX,

Thanks for the kind words. However, the ends does not justify the means. When I was in Form 5 (and that was very, very long ago), I had a classmate whose life cycle is party-exam-party while most of our life cycles were study-exam-party.

Needless to say, his performance in class left a lot to be desired. One day, a teacher (a real pain-in-the-posterior) said to him, "If you pass your senior Cambridge (i.e. O levels), I'll cut off my head." My friend felt hurt and angry. Actually, he was more angry than hurt. He set out with grim determination to pass his exams so that he can have the pleasure of confronting the teacher and demanding his head.

He emarked on what can best be described as a mission of someone with an obessive desire for revenge. Needless to say, my friend passed his O levels with reasonably good results. Did he confront the teacher? Of course not! He was mature enough by then to decide to ignore that grumpy old man.

Did he feel any gratitude to his teacher. Again, of course not! True, he was motivated by the hurtful words of his teacher. True, he succeeded because of the criticism. However, I didn't believe (and neither did he) that the teacher actually meant to motivate him to succeed. His intention was to denigrade,not motivate. If someone tries to hurt you but you are wise enough to use that to your advantage, you have no reason to feel grateful to that person.

Therefore, when people try to disparage your efforts, you should instead turn the tables on them. That's why you should never criticise your enemies lest they take your criticisms to heart and actually do something to improve themselves. In the same manner, don't poke fun at your competitors by pointing out their mistakes. They may actually believe you and rectify their mistakes! In short, don't get angry, get even. Although my criticism of my student as a flash in the pan motivated him, I would be dishonest if I were to claim that I did it with the best of intentions. In truth, it wasn't. It was one of the casual remarks that I dished out without realising that the poor guy would take it to heart. That it actually had a positive outcome is not really the point. The credit goes to him, not to me. The one that is really praisworthy is the student, not the teacher.

Somebody I knew once made a very nasty comment about a girl who was (to use a politically acceptable word) chubby. The girl was interested in him. Instead of responding to her overtures, he called her a fat pig. Many years later, he met her again. He was shocked to see that she had morphed into a very attractive woman. I'm not sure if she was motivated by his insults to do something about her weight. One thing I was sure of was that I felt really happy when she responded to his attempts to be friendly by telling him to piss off. (Actually, she used another four letter word other than "piss" but I won't spell it out since the message is essentially the same).

There are better ways to motivate someone than to use hurtful remarks. Therefore, I was really happy that that student of mine had the wisdom to use my rather unkind remark as a motivation to excel.

there are some hidden moral values in here, i hope my friends can appreciate from it, because i appreciated :D

Dr Dunker · Joined: 02 Jun 2006 Posts: 466 Location: Puchong,Selangor

Hmmm, very interesting. Wonder why the name of the person he wrote to was changed to XXX...

Dr Nat · Joined: 07 Dec 2005 Posts: 1834 Location: Klang Valley

Didnt have to change names...
and you could just put a link there: http://www.vet.com.my/viewtopic.php?p=5198&highlight=#5198

Dr Nat · Joined: 07 Dec 2005 Posts: 1834 Location: Klang Valley

I prefer his advice here: http://www.vet.com.my/viewtopic.php?p=4076&highlight=#4076

kenny8282 · Joined: 08 Jul 2006 Posts: 70

this is because i think you may not like it.therefore i chose to change your name :D i hope you don't mind??!!.and besides, if you do get mad, i'll maybe in trouble again, i don't wish to put my hand on fire!!?? :D